1:51 AM

 And I am awake.  Been dealing with being tired post infusion.  Today was one of the days where I was tired.  Not enough to sleep.  But just enough to basically not do anything but stay in a recliner.  I did muster the strength to get on the treadmill.  But it was very difficult.  Hand on the rails, trying not to fall.  But made 2 miles.   Then back to resting.  Getting up to get food, or even eat, is a chore type-day.

And now my back is hurting.  It has started a couple of weeks ago.  Could be the cancer.  Or it could be some myocitis from the radiation treatment.  It has the same kind of pain as when it started in 2022 after the radiation I had then.  The timing is about right.

I need to write some more, including a race report.  I did a half-marathon a couple of weeks ago as the final leg of a relay in the last Atlantic City Ironman 70.3.  Yesterday was 5 years since I completed it solo, 9 months after I started triathlon training - which I when I found out my cancer was inoperable and incurable.

#iTRI4aCure

#EmbraceTheSlow

This One Hurts

 Yesterday, after I came home from the Boulders game, I found out a friend passed away.  It was not unexpected, they had been put into hospice in mid-August and they were not expected to last more than a few days.

This has happened often since I have been diagnosed with cancer - you make friends with other patients on various boards.  There are about 1/2 dozen people who became friends, as compared to of acquaintances. Like my other friends I made, we never actually met face-to-face, though we came close to being able to make it happen.  

We had exchanged many messages through the years. About treatment.  About the frustration of insurance companies. About exercise.  About drug trials.  About information, or the lack thereof, regarding treatments. About what was good food on the menus at MSK. About how drug treatments affected us and letting the other know there was nothing to worry about if somehow they were given the same drug at some point.  

My friend had a met to the brain earlier this year.  They underwent successful treatment. They remained positive despite everything they had been through the last 5 years.

I sent a message in April, but did not hear back.  Sometimes it would take a bit of time to reply depending on what was going on and they had been through a lot with the surgery.  I sent another message in May.  

Then in June I received a reply. There was another brain met.  They also asked how I was doing, even with all that was going on.

I immediately replied.  Reiterated an offer that I would be happy to stop by if they needed an ear or some help with things.  That I could check with Yale to see what drug trials were available they wanted.  And I also let them know my trial was going well, but it looked like one of my spine tumors was active.  

I never heard back on that message.   

Though I have been through this before, this one hurts.