According to Webster's dictionary:
Scanxiety - is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease related to CTs, MRIs or similar medical tests for determining whether cancer exists or has progressed.
Okay, it really is not a word in Webster's dictionary. But it is a word cancer patients (and often their friends and family) know very well.
Winding through cancer visits and scans have a various level of scanxiety. It depends on the timing of the scan and whether it is a benchmark scan in someone's mind. For instance, the first scan after starting chemo had a higher level of scanxiety than other scans during chemo for me. A follow up scan after it appeared that something was growing on my lung had a high scanxiety factor.
Today was a higher scanixety day. When the scan in the fall showed my cancer was back and inoperable, I began alternative therapies (mushrooms/herbs), but they had only been implemented for about 4 weeks before the first follow up scan. The first follow up showed growth in the lymph nodes (which was considered "slow growing") and new spots on my lungs.
As of today's scan, I have three and half months or so of the mushrooms and vitamins being used fairly consistently (long story on the initial start and stop) and about 3 months of consistent exercise in the form of triathlon training.
In my mind this is a benchmark. There is a part of me that believes this will slow things down or perhaps I may even see a reduction. You try to not get hopes up too much because it makes the bad news worse. The few times I got hopeful (i.e., like when I thought my first two year plus scan was going to be clean and I beat it, but it wasn't) never worked out. But I will see. Though I guessing the scans have been read already, I will not know the results for 4-7 days. Scanxiety.
@iTri4aCure
Cancer came back for the third time in 3 years the end of 2017. Inoperable. Signed up for my 1st Triathlon that day and started training. Ironman 70.3 Finisher Fall 2018. Just missed another 70.3 finish in Fall 2019, after another 22 rounds of chemo and 3 radiation treatments since the Fall 2018 finish. Chemo stopped working December 2019. Looking to race in 2021
Monday, March 19, 2018
Sunday, March 18, 2018
Las Olas Race Report
[ROUGH REPORT OF LAS OLAS TRIATHLON. I HAVE BEEN REMISS IN POSTING]
It was the day before my first triathlon and I was feeling pretty good. I had following the training that my coaches set out. I had a sense of where I thought I would be in the race time wise (which turned out to be correct) and my main concerns were what to eat and making sure I was hydrated.
For the later I had purchased a couple of cases of water for my hotel room during my stay and made sure to drink 8 16 ounce bottles that day to ensure I hit the target. I had no idea what I wanted for dinner, so went with my old standby favorite of chicken parmagina and pasta.
Everyone warned me I would not sleep the night before the race, but it really was a non-issue. I had a bit of an allergy/cold thing happening that was cleared up with some Alka Seltzer nightime and it got me to sleep. Other than waking up in the middle of the night with the realization we had not changed flights to go home, about 1/2 hour before the fare lock expired, I slept straight through. I felt okay in the morning, even though we had to get to check-in between 5:30 to 6:30 or so. And despite the fact we had lost an hour of sleep due to daylight savings time.
I had a yogurt, a couple of hard boiled eggs, a banana and a bagel when I woke up. Was a bit earlier than I wanted, about an two hours before my start time, but with the schedule it seemed to work out the best.
I had never set up in a transition before. I have been around them, seeing other people setting up. But it was the first time I was there as a participant. I had my bags organized from the day before and had gone over what I wanted to do ahead of time. I got set-up fairly quickly and was a bit concerned it was too quickly. I double checked things. Socks rolled out. Hemlet unclipped. Gu taped to bike (courtesy of my brother). Extra Gu in my tri top pocket. Sunglasses. Hat. Everything checked out.
My brother and I left and went back to the hotel for a bit.
We headed back out to the course and started heading down the beach. The weather reports looked to be spot on. 2-4 ft waves. It was a bit of a haul over the sand, but we got to the start. It was at that time it was confirmed. The Olympic distance swim distance was being cut down to the Sprint of 500 meters due to the conditions. (My brother was in the Olympic distance, I was in the Sprint.)
I hung out with my brother until his group was going, got some video for him on my iPhone, then got ready. Took a Gu out, per coach's instructions, about 20 minutes before my start time.
I was on the swim team in high school and was also used to a bit of ocean swimming from my scuba diving. But it had been QUITE awhile since I had been swimming prior to starting training 12 weeks before. I expected to be able to do okay in the swim. I was not in high school shape, but based on workouts in the pool, I was sure I could make 500 meters. Maybe not fast. Maybe not pretty. But would make it. I was sure, with the wetsuit, 15 minutes would be an easy pace and thought I could go maybe a couple of minutes faster.
Put the wetsuit on and got into the water to warm up. It was definately not fun. Still figured 15 minutes at high end. Wrong.
It turns out the conditions were so rough (at least for those of us who do not get a chance to do open water swims in the Northeast as compared to the Florida types) that when my brother got out of his swim, he was trying to get me to blow off the swim portion and just go to bike and make it a duathlon. The message never got to me, too far away for anyone to get to me in time. I am not sure I would have listened anyway. I doubt I would have turned away from doing all three things at that point. Stubborn sometimes.
I got ready at the starting line. Not nervous at all. Not quite sure why I was not nervous. I think I got my worrying out before. It also helped that I wound up next to talkers at the starting line. My general understanding is that at the start there are two types - the quiet leave me along types and the talkers. I was standing next to a few guys talking and one made a joke about not rushing in transition. He was going to have a scotch and cigar as he got ready for the bike. I laughed as I heard this and told him I would stop by where his bike was when I was done with my swim. The few of us killed some time talking up to the when we ready to start. Put my goggles on and got ready.
Was told to start and we headed out. I was trying to figure out when to start swimming. I was told as soon as possible was a good idea and made it through the waves. I thought I could have started swimming maybe 15 feet earlier, but was trying to time the wave. Started swimming. Not fun.
The first buoy was 50 meters out or so. It was tough. Based on pre race conversations and information, apparently that was the roughest part and once past the buoy and making the left to follow the course north, it was going to be easy.
By the time I made it to the first buouy part of me was thinking "Okay, nice try, time to call it a day." And that continued as I headed north. Each time I tried to swim I was getting caught and winding up with water in my mouth and getting battered. I would do a couple of strokes then had to stop. Rolled onto my back.
I finally realized some things. There was no way I was going to stop. I was going to get past the swim. I had come too far in training and what I was trying to accomplish. The bracelets on my left wrist reminded me. I also realized if I kept on fighting with freestyle I would be burned out and not make it. Breast stroke time. Kind of modified, not pretty breast stroke. But it got me going. It was difficult to spot the markers. A couple of times I had to tread water and take my googles off. I was concerned I would catch a wave in my face, but my goggle color, slightly tinted, seemed to make it difficult to see them. It was 400 meters of a meter at a time. Trying to make it to the next marker. Hoping to see the green marker for the left turn back to the beach.
The distances seemed to take forever to cover. I saw a couple of people with my color cap still out there behind me. I finally made the left and I headed to the beach. I started to freestyle in for a bit. Then back to breast stroke. I probably stood up a bit early and should have gone in further. But I made it to land. Got on the beach. Waved at my family even though I did not look like a happy camper. I hit my Garmin and saw a bit under 17 minutes. I felt like I was out there at least twice as long. I also knew I was going to finish the triathlon at that time.
It was a decent distance to get to the bike and I jogged/trotted. Running is not my strong suit, but I was not going to walk. Got to my bike and the first thing I did was put my sunglasses on, helmet on, and clipped it, before touching anything else. I did not want to get DQ'd for a mistake on the helmet.
Put on my socks and biking shoes. A bit of water, popped open a Gu and quickly went to the course. Thought I did well moving through transition (turns out I did REALLY well on the first one. I can't swim, bike or run quickly. But I can get my shoes on. As long as they are velcro or clips and not shoe laces.)
I was told to move to the side as others ran out and waited to get into the line to get on the course. The officials were pointing out spots along the course - "Go out past the person on the white bike, get on and start clipping in there" - to keep traffic moving.
Got my right foot in, started pedeling and the left foot got into place quickly. I was pretty happy. The day before I was having issues with the clips. No problem race day. Awesome. I started going and I realized my left had was sticky. With Jetberry Blue Gu on it. Fanstastic.
Something happened with my Garmin, perhaps I hit a button somewhere along the way, and it was not tracking my triathlon. Probably user error. And I also forgot to put it on my handlebars to track things. Figured I could count my RPMS without help. Well not really, but I did not want to get slowed down setting things up.
I started biking. And I felt good. The course was beautiful. Biking up A1A next to the ocean. Soon I found myself calling out "On your left" and passing people. I tried to shift to the large ring and for some reason it did not go, even though I had tested it the day before. Small ring for the bike ride.
I had mapped out the course on Rouvy and when I made the first turn I realized I still had a long way to go to get to the finish. So much for thinking I was almost done. But I was still feeling good.
The hardest part was the first bridge. I went all the way to the easiest gear for the incline, but there was a grate on the bridge and there was a small section, a couple of feet wide, to bike on. I almost went off there somehow, the closest I came to taking a fall.
There were many police officers, EMS/Rescue personnel and volunteers along the route. They did a great job of keeping an eye on traffic and letting the race proceed. I did not have to stop or slow down once - they had all the traffic held and guided perfectly. I nodded my thanks often and was even able to say thanks a few times as I realized I could still speak and was not winded.
The route went through a residential area and I was not quite sure if we hit the park yet. I recalled that the park was about halfway through on Rouvy. I asked a volunteer "Park?." They told me no. Bummer. Thought I was further. But I still felt good.
I was getting a little tired, more needing to stretch, stood up off the seat and the park came up. Perfect timing. And then I saw my brother, he was heading out as I was heading in. I called to him, but did not not acknoweldge me. Later on he said he thought he heard someone call out. It would have been good if he had seen me. He was worried about the swim and did not relax until he got back to transition from the bike and my wife told him I was out on the course.
The park was awesome. A perfect deliniation in the bike ride. A way to regroup a bit and get ready to finish the bike portion. As I exited the park, I decided I was going to sign up for Las Olas next year just because how awesome the bike section was.
I headed back south along the ocean and hit a bit of a head wind. We were told coming back the wind would be behind us, but it was a bit of effort at this point. But I knew where I was on the bike path at this point (I had run back and forth on the route the days before the triathlon) and landmarks were familiar. If there was any doubt I was getting close, my nephew yelled out to me. I gave him a smile and yelled back. I knew I was a minute or two out of transition.
As I got closer, took my left foot out, slowed down and got ready to walk off the bike and into transition. I put my bike on the rack and stepped away to make sure I was not touching it. I grabbed one of my bottles of water, rinsed off the Gu on my hand and unbuckled the helmet. The buckle released without issue. A big accomplishment for me actually. Sometimes the clip and I are not the best of friends and it takes a bit to extricate myself. But not on race day.
Got my hat on, tucked a bottle of water in my jersey and held another in my hand, started out for the run. Got my Garmin working to track the run as an outside run. Washed down a couple of enduralytes and continued running. Or what I try to pass off as running.
It was about 75 degrees for the run, so that helped. My coach told me not to walk at all and I did not. I did my version of running. Much to my suprise I actually passed a couple of people on the way who had slowed down or walked. I kept on looking for the turnaround. Did not see it. Then I looked at my Garmin. Hmmm. .25 miles. Guess that was why I did not see the turnaround yet.
At about the mile mark a woman called out she wanted to pass. I moved over, but she settled into my left. And started talking to me. "This seems to be a long 5K" she said and we went from there. I called out every tenth of a mile as we ran together, looking for the turnaround, telling her she could make it (She did make it. I saw her name in the results.) I had an unopened bottle of water and extra Gu and offered it to her, though she declined. We probably wound up running close to a mile together, discussing various things. How we decided to train for triathlons, vacations, whatever. As we were heading north, looking for the turnaround, my brother was heading south. He asked me how I was doing as we executed a semi high five. Told him I was fine.
The woman and I finally made it to the turnaround and headed south. Somehow we got seperated and our discussion ended. I looked at my Garmin as the distance increased. 2 miles. I was going to make it. I started feeling pretty good when I passed Bubber Gump's on the way back in. I knew I was getting close. Then I saw the hotel across the street from transition and the finish line.
I ran into the parking lot that led to the finish line and my nephew was there, running in with me. Trying to get me to go a bit faster. But I was not in any rush. I knew I was going to finish and was enjoying the end of the race.
A couple hundred feet out I started smiling. Then for the briefest instance, kind of felt like I was tearing up, which then went back to smiles. I do not recall them announing my name as I crossed the finish line. I still felt good. Someone quickly grabbed me and removed my timer. Then someone put a finisher medal around my neck.
I never thought I would participate in a triathlon of any distance. I always thought it was a real cool event, but it was not me. 12 weeks ago I decided to to enter a triathlon and train. A week ago today, I finished my first triathlon.
@iTRI4aCure
It was the day before my first triathlon and I was feeling pretty good. I had following the training that my coaches set out. I had a sense of where I thought I would be in the race time wise (which turned out to be correct) and my main concerns were what to eat and making sure I was hydrated.
For the later I had purchased a couple of cases of water for my hotel room during my stay and made sure to drink 8 16 ounce bottles that day to ensure I hit the target. I had no idea what I wanted for dinner, so went with my old standby favorite of chicken parmagina and pasta.
Everyone warned me I would not sleep the night before the race, but it really was a non-issue. I had a bit of an allergy/cold thing happening that was cleared up with some Alka Seltzer nightime and it got me to sleep. Other than waking up in the middle of the night with the realization we had not changed flights to go home, about 1/2 hour before the fare lock expired, I slept straight through. I felt okay in the morning, even though we had to get to check-in between 5:30 to 6:30 or so. And despite the fact we had lost an hour of sleep due to daylight savings time.
I had a yogurt, a couple of hard boiled eggs, a banana and a bagel when I woke up. Was a bit earlier than I wanted, about an two hours before my start time, but with the schedule it seemed to work out the best.
I had never set up in a transition before. I have been around them, seeing other people setting up. But it was the first time I was there as a participant. I had my bags organized from the day before and had gone over what I wanted to do ahead of time. I got set-up fairly quickly and was a bit concerned it was too quickly. I double checked things. Socks rolled out. Hemlet unclipped. Gu taped to bike (courtesy of my brother). Extra Gu in my tri top pocket. Sunglasses. Hat. Everything checked out.
My brother and I left and went back to the hotel for a bit.
We headed back out to the course and started heading down the beach. The weather reports looked to be spot on. 2-4 ft waves. It was a bit of a haul over the sand, but we got to the start. It was at that time it was confirmed. The Olympic distance swim distance was being cut down to the Sprint of 500 meters due to the conditions. (My brother was in the Olympic distance, I was in the Sprint.)
I hung out with my brother until his group was going, got some video for him on my iPhone, then got ready. Took a Gu out, per coach's instructions, about 20 minutes before my start time.
I was on the swim team in high school and was also used to a bit of ocean swimming from my scuba diving. But it had been QUITE awhile since I had been swimming prior to starting training 12 weeks before. I expected to be able to do okay in the swim. I was not in high school shape, but based on workouts in the pool, I was sure I could make 500 meters. Maybe not fast. Maybe not pretty. But would make it. I was sure, with the wetsuit, 15 minutes would be an easy pace and thought I could go maybe a couple of minutes faster.
Put the wetsuit on and got into the water to warm up. It was definately not fun. Still figured 15 minutes at high end. Wrong.
It turns out the conditions were so rough (at least for those of us who do not get a chance to do open water swims in the Northeast as compared to the Florida types) that when my brother got out of his swim, he was trying to get me to blow off the swim portion and just go to bike and make it a duathlon. The message never got to me, too far away for anyone to get to me in time. I am not sure I would have listened anyway. I doubt I would have turned away from doing all three things at that point. Stubborn sometimes.
I got ready at the starting line. Not nervous at all. Not quite sure why I was not nervous. I think I got my worrying out before. It also helped that I wound up next to talkers at the starting line. My general understanding is that at the start there are two types - the quiet leave me along types and the talkers. I was standing next to a few guys talking and one made a joke about not rushing in transition. He was going to have a scotch and cigar as he got ready for the bike. I laughed as I heard this and told him I would stop by where his bike was when I was done with my swim. The few of us killed some time talking up to the when we ready to start. Put my goggles on and got ready.
Was told to start and we headed out. I was trying to figure out when to start swimming. I was told as soon as possible was a good idea and made it through the waves. I thought I could have started swimming maybe 15 feet earlier, but was trying to time the wave. Started swimming. Not fun.
The first buoy was 50 meters out or so. It was tough. Based on pre race conversations and information, apparently that was the roughest part and once past the buoy and making the left to follow the course north, it was going to be easy.
By the time I made it to the first buouy part of me was thinking "Okay, nice try, time to call it a day." And that continued as I headed north. Each time I tried to swim I was getting caught and winding up with water in my mouth and getting battered. I would do a couple of strokes then had to stop. Rolled onto my back.
 | |
|
The distances seemed to take forever to cover. I saw a couple of people with my color cap still out there behind me. I finally made the left and I headed to the beach. I started to freestyle in for a bit. Then back to breast stroke. I probably stood up a bit early and should have gone in further. But I made it to land. Got on the beach. Waved at my family even though I did not look like a happy camper. I hit my Garmin and saw a bit under 17 minutes. I felt like I was out there at least twice as long. I also knew I was going to finish the triathlon at that time.
It was a decent distance to get to the bike and I jogged/trotted. Running is not my strong suit, but I was not going to walk. Got to my bike and the first thing I did was put my sunglasses on, helmet on, and clipped it, before touching anything else. I did not want to get DQ'd for a mistake on the helmet.
Put on my socks and biking shoes. A bit of water, popped open a Gu and quickly went to the course. Thought I did well moving through transition (turns out I did REALLY well on the first one. I can't swim, bike or run quickly. But I can get my shoes on. As long as they are velcro or clips and not shoe laces.)
 |
| No laces, no problem |
I was told to move to the side as others ran out and waited to get into the line to get on the course. The officials were pointing out spots along the course - "Go out past the person on the white bike, get on and start clipping in there" - to keep traffic moving.
Got my right foot in, started pedeling and the left foot got into place quickly. I was pretty happy. The day before I was having issues with the clips. No problem race day. Awesome. I started going and I realized my left had was sticky. With Jetberry Blue Gu on it. Fanstastic.
Something happened with my Garmin, perhaps I hit a button somewhere along the way, and it was not tracking my triathlon. Probably user error. And I also forgot to put it on my handlebars to track things. Figured I could count my RPMS without help. Well not really, but I did not want to get slowed down setting things up.
I started biking. And I felt good. The course was beautiful. Biking up A1A next to the ocean. Soon I found myself calling out "On your left" and passing people. I tried to shift to the large ring and for some reason it did not go, even though I had tested it the day before. Small ring for the bike ride.
I had mapped out the course on Rouvy and when I made the first turn I realized I still had a long way to go to get to the finish. So much for thinking I was almost done. But I was still feeling good.
The hardest part was the first bridge. I went all the way to the easiest gear for the incline, but there was a grate on the bridge and there was a small section, a couple of feet wide, to bike on. I almost went off there somehow, the closest I came to taking a fall.
There were many police officers, EMS/Rescue personnel and volunteers along the route. They did a great job of keeping an eye on traffic and letting the race proceed. I did not have to stop or slow down once - they had all the traffic held and guided perfectly. I nodded my thanks often and was even able to say thanks a few times as I realized I could still speak and was not winded.
The route went through a residential area and I was not quite sure if we hit the park yet. I recalled that the park was about halfway through on Rouvy. I asked a volunteer "Park?." They told me no. Bummer. Thought I was further. But I still felt good.
 |
| The Park Portion of the Bike Ride |
The park was awesome. A perfect deliniation in the bike ride. A way to regroup a bit and get ready to finish the bike portion. As I exited the park, I decided I was going to sign up for Las Olas next year just because how awesome the bike section was.
I headed back south along the ocean and hit a bit of a head wind. We were told coming back the wind would be behind us, but it was a bit of effort at this point. But I knew where I was on the bike path at this point (I had run back and forth on the route the days before the triathlon) and landmarks were familiar. If there was any doubt I was getting close, my nephew yelled out to me. I gave him a smile and yelled back. I knew I was a minute or two out of transition.
As I got closer, took my left foot out, slowed down and got ready to walk off the bike and into transition. I put my bike on the rack and stepped away to make sure I was not touching it. I grabbed one of my bottles of water, rinsed off the Gu on my hand and unbuckled the helmet. The buckle released without issue. A big accomplishment for me actually. Sometimes the clip and I are not the best of friends and it takes a bit to extricate myself. But not on race day.
 |
| My wife captured me smiling as I started the run. 5K until I did what I set out to do. |
It was about 75 degrees for the run, so that helped. My coach told me not to walk at all and I did not. I did my version of running. Much to my suprise I actually passed a couple of people on the way who had slowed down or walked. I kept on looking for the turnaround. Did not see it. Then I looked at my Garmin. Hmmm. .25 miles. Guess that was why I did not see the turnaround yet.
At about the mile mark a woman called out she wanted to pass. I moved over, but she settled into my left. And started talking to me. "This seems to be a long 5K" she said and we went from there. I called out every tenth of a mile as we ran together, looking for the turnaround, telling her she could make it (She did make it. I saw her name in the results.) I had an unopened bottle of water and extra Gu and offered it to her, though she declined. We probably wound up running close to a mile together, discussing various things. How we decided to train for triathlons, vacations, whatever. As we were heading north, looking for the turnaround, my brother was heading south. He asked me how I was doing as we executed a semi high five. Told him I was fine.
The woman and I finally made it to the turnaround and headed south. Somehow we got seperated and our discussion ended. I looked at my Garmin as the distance increased. 2 miles. I was going to make it. I started feeling pretty good when I passed Bubber Gump's on the way back in. I knew I was getting close. Then I saw the hotel across the street from transition and the finish line.
I ran into the parking lot that led to the finish line and my nephew was there, running in with me. Trying to get me to go a bit faster. But I was not in any rush. I knew I was going to finish and was enjoying the end of the race.
A couple hundred feet out I started smiling. Then for the briefest instance, kind of felt like I was tearing up, which then went back to smiles. I do not recall them announing my name as I crossed the finish line. I still felt good. Someone quickly grabbed me and removed my timer. Then someone put a finisher medal around my neck.
I never thought I would participate in a triathlon of any distance. I always thought it was a real cool event, but it was not me. 12 weeks ago I decided to to enter a triathlon and train. A week ago today, I finished my first triathlon.
@iTRI4aCure
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